hot_foot_steph | (no subject)

I'm so depressed and stressed.

I started working on this photoalbum/scrapbook for my parents for Christmas, and it sucks. Why? Because I have no patience. I have to start it immediately without thinking it through before I get started. I'm too impatient to use the fancy scissors that cut cool edges and go find a cropper. So I just cut them out into uneven squares and stuff because I'm too impatient to be creative and neat. So it doesn't look good and I'm 19 and I've been acting irritable and babyish for the past 3 days.

I get stressed out over the easiest, most unstressful things.

I came home with 2 bags of things. I'm leaving with 4 and I'm not taking back anything that I didn't bring up here.

What is wrong with me. I am too lazy to even fold clothes into my bags to where they fit better.

I'm going crazy for some reason.

Maybe I'm just tired, I don't know.

Jared hasn't called tonight and now I'm worried that he's dead or something.

Is this all because of the wreck?

I feel fat and ugly. And I've got pimples that have sprouted all over my face just recently. I wish I could be pretty without make-up. I'm so UGLY.

I feel so unmotivated.

WHAT is WRONG with me?

I've been scared of God lately because of the wreck, and I don't feel close to Him at all.

I haven't spent much time with Him, either...

I think I'm going crazy. I want to cry. AND I have to get up early tomorrow for church and all I want to do is sleep.

There's never any TIME.